John Nooney: HIV Meds

Little pills of life
That kill the little death
Floating around inside of me.

I hate them.
I need them.

They take away the quality of my life
While giving me quantity of life.

They keep me healthy.
They make me sick.

They are the eternal balance:
Good and Evil
Right and Wrong
Life and Death.

© John Nooney 2014
blog: Johnbalaya


10 thoughts on “John Nooney: HIV Meds

  1. Pingback: A Bit of Shameless Self-Promotion | Johnbalaya

  2. You know John, as a fake medical expert who studies drugs, I think this is the perfect description of medications for serious illness. They are always a trade off, as you and I both know all too well.

    • Yes, like you, I am a fake expert too …

      Love/Hate relationships abound in this life, and, for me, the love/hate relationship I have with these drugs is the most powerful of them all. I’d throw every damn pill in the trash if I knew I wouldn’t get sick and die without them … well, ok, I’m already sick, and they make me feel sick…

      Maybe it’s just the powerlessness of it all …. knowing that the alternatives to not taking them are not good.

  3. I’m a retired nurse. When I worked, I called myself the pill pusher. My duty was to convince my patients that they needed a few pills. And to give them the courage to swallow them. Now, in my old age, beset with different illnesses, I need to take 12 a day for comfort and survival. It’s so hard! Your poem truly speaks to my heart and mind. I wrote it down to help me at pill taking time. Thank you!

  4. I have five different medications: three for my head and two for my asthma.
    I don’t have to use the asthma ones every day but the other ones, yes.
    One of them, although very effective, and making my life much easier, is also making me gain weight quite rapidly. When I was in my late teens I was very overweight and I have no wish to be ten and a half stone ever again. I’m only five foot two. And I’m showing my age with my use of imperial measurements, aren’t I? :)
    Any way, this particular medication, serequel, is the one I have a love hate relationship with. There’s no way I’ll stop taking it but I do feel kind of resentful. I hope to just cut down my dosage. Some time.

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